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[25 Mar 2002|08:15pm] |
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mood |
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 moody |
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R You are restricted. Well done, you're now
practically adult in nature, and plus, you
get to see nudity - have fun.
"Which Movie Classification Are You?"
Test created by Jamie - take it here.
what a wonderful day
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[10 Mar 2002|12:35am] |
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mood |
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moody |
] |
Take the High Yield Killing Method Test Now!!
Congratulations, you are a Serial Killer! Others prefer mass killings, or years of blood and hate, but your blood-lust is much more cultivated and refined. A high body count is not your turn on, you like the hunt, the selection of the perfect prey, and the slow torture before the kill. S ometimes, you renew your thirst for life by consuming a portion of your victim. Some people like caviar and classical music, you like human eyes and bloodcurling shrieks of ultimate pain. There is, as they say, no accounting for taste.
steak, anyone?
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| the pursuit of happiness |
[28 Feb 2002|09:28pm] |
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mood |
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 satisfied |
] |
my psych test is over and I am so relieved.. now I have to wait for the results, which will be an anxious wait. After that, I'll probably have to worry about what the test will do to my avg. This goes on forever..
I read somewhere that we shouldn't worry about stuff, because if there's a solution to it, we shouldn't worry, and if we can't do anything about it, worrying won't matter. I guess the second part is right, but if there's a solution, we ought to worry. If we didn't worry about anything, nothing would go right for us. A 30 on a first test would make a guy say, "it's okay, I don't have to worry, I can just study for the next one".
What really happens is, he won't study for that second test. This has been proven time and time again by people I know.
And then of course there are guys that think it's "cool" to not care about stuff. I guess they get it from how girls say they want a laid back guy, which sometimes translates to confidence. I understand that concept, and the confidence deal, but worrying about something does not necessarily mean the person is unable to handle it.
I think [and I emphasize think] that some girls want a confident guy partly because they want a guy that can accomplish things. That goes for some guys too I think, they'd like a girl that can do stuff.
But out of the cases I've seen, the people that worry a lot are the ones that get things done, and the ones that are supposedly "laid back" and "so cool" are the ones that get nowhere. Of course, I can't say any names here.
And then there are people that don't care about failing or succeeding. I guess they can be happy in their way, but I know that there are other people that find their happiness in other ways.
Like succeeding.
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[26 Feb 2002|02:19am] |
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mood |
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 determined |
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"as i was going to st. ives, i met a man with 7 wives, every wife had 7 sacks, every sack had 7 cats, every cat had 7 kittens; kittens, cats, sacks and wives, how many were going to st. ives?.."
day 4 of being sick..
just a cough now, its a vast improvement from saturday night when i was basically dead. bigger things on my mind now though..
"shit hits the fan" on 2/28 ..
hopefully things will be well and i'll be able to enjoy my weekend back in ny.
lately ive been going back to ny more frequently than last semester.. back from winter vacation i've gone back for two weekends, and stayed here 3 [including this past weekend]. spring vacation is in a week and a half.. and i know exactly what i'll be doing: i'll be hanging out in ny and going about stuff i've put off for far too long.
i'd like to conclude this with a long-lost rhyme i heard in a kickass movie produced a few years ago. i think it conveys my hopes all too well:
birds of a feather flock together,
as do pigs and swine.
rats and mice have their chance,
as will i have mine.
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| lol |
[20 Feb 2002|11:31pm] |
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mood |
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 amused |
] |
People were dropped into you, and basically deep-fried to a golden brown. It probably takes a little while for you to lose your temper, but when you do...
What torture would you be?
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[20 Feb 2002|12:06pm] |
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mood |
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predatory |
] |
sniping has always been fun lol
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[19 Feb 2002|12:38pm] |
britney spears is so fucking hot.
hi jill! heh
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| patriots. |
[03 Feb 2002|10:28pm] |
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mood |
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ecstatic |
] |
yes =)
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[02 Feb 2002|02:34am] |
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mood |
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 anxious |
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music |
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some song on k-rock |
] |
patriots.
if the rams ram through i'd be very amused.
and very poor, too...
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| i dont get girls. i just dont. |
[26 Jan 2002|01:44pm] |
There are days when you wake up and know things are going to go down.
Then there are days when you wake up like you'd wake up any other day and figure it'll all be the same as yesterday.
And you've gotten so used to this calm that you can actually feel calm when things do go down. You go into this denial mode where you don't necessary exclaim that shit aren't happening, but you simply just bypass it. Yet everytime your mind does cross it, it reminds you of its presence, the squeak from the back of your consciousness flaunting its evil elegance. And of course, there are other squeaks back there, so they join in the chorus as well until you no longer pass the thought but sink into it, as the horde of your unwanted memories pull you into their dungeon of the dark where you've kept them all this time.
You realize this is it, you're in for the long haul.
You take a look at your callused, cut, bleeding hands, because you've crawled out of this hell just a while ago. You look up and wonder if anyone's up there. Then you look back down and realize that this tyrannical bullshit will keep growing, and no matter how many friends you've "told" your problems to, it won't thin or weaken. Emotional cholesterol, except when you've got it, you've literally got to live with it. You're going to crawl back out eventually, sucked back down eventually, and the more time passes, the deeper the hole, the harder the climb back up. When people give up climbing back up they jump off a building or pop a slug in the mind that's been haunting them all this time. You look at your hands and your life and decide maybe one more climb will be worth it. Who knows, maybe something momentarily satisfying is waiting for you? Hell, forget satisfying, maybe something peaceful, maybe nothing at all? You'd settle for that. You'd settle for anything except more negativity, you'd settle for anything except staying down in this pit.
You wipe your eyes and crack your knuckles and climb. You look up to see where your hands are going and conclude, there's no one up there.
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| high school |
[03 Nov 2001|12:38am] |
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mood |
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 melancholy |
] |
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music |
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Shawn Colvin - Sunny Came Home |
] |
Could he daily feel a stab of hunger for her and find nourishment in the very sight of her? I think so. Would she see through the bars of his plight and ache for him?
-Hannibal Lecter
i miss stuy
i miss all the camaraderie, the liveliness, where something funny/sad/crazy happens everyday. everyday.
i miss the bullshit, the hatred even, the humorous cliques, the small talk and big talk of the cafeteria, my lunch table, cutting, SENIORITIS.
i miss the lockers, the feeling of being a senior and knowing everything bout the place.
i miss the broken escalators, sneaking onto the elevators, sneaking out of the building.
i miss the view of tribeca as i go to the can, and all the other privileges of being a stuy student.
i miss the funny faculty, the guards, the proms, the sense of community, the city surrounding, the feeling going home near dusk with projects due but you're strolling along chambers st. because deep down you know its going to be all good.
why? just because.
i miss stuy
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| back |
[22 Sep 2001|01:22pm] |
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mood |
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 lazy |
] |
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music |
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Foo Fighters - Everlong |
] |
well, its been quite a while since i last updated..and a lot has happened.
i came to rutgers three weeks ago, and at first i hated it. it was too quiet! before i came here i thought i'd benefit from the peace, but i totally forgot how im a city person. the first 3 days drove me semi-insane.
then it got better, met my cousin larry's friends, and finally it wasnt so quiet anymore. a week after i got there i went to this house party, and it was pretty cool..
::at first, i wasnt gonna go, and drank some beers and shots of brandy. finally around 10 pm, people convinced me to go, and i hung out at tom's dorm waiting for my cousin larry to pick us up. i went to the bathroom twice, and on the second visit, a girl walked in. i was in a stall [theres no urinals here to define the rooms!] and i didnt close the stall door. she chose my stall cuz it was closest to the door, and when she saw me she said "oh my god" and left. i went after [after i was done] and asked "wait..isnt this the men's room?" ::"no, the men's room is on the other side", and as she was correcting me, i noticed "WOMEN" on the bathroom door. ::"oh shit, im so fucked up right now, sorry.."
finally around 10 pm larry comes and picks us up. at the party i drank some more [beer and dry gin] and that just x'ed me out. i started saying whats up to everyone i saw, and i reportedly showed people my golf swing. there were 2 fights at the party, one right when we got there, and another when we were about to leave. i heard the next day that apparently, some guy was talking to a girl outside, and some drunk whizzed off the 3rd floor, hitting the couple. i smoked a few cigs, and i remember taunting a cop driving by..
[the good part was that i didnt barf! i was esctatic, but then again im known to have a tough tummy. ive swallowed some listerine when someone made me laugh before, and it turned out ok]::
classes are ok, havent been going to a few lectures though, but thats quite alright.
and then...shit happened.
i went back to ny last weekend and took a ton of pics of the wreck.. the closest they allowed people were the approx 5, 6 blocks around wtc. i scanned in some of the better pics, i'll put them up later.
i went back last friday, and on saturday i went on my first excursion. i tried their borders, all the way from the hudson river down to battery park. when i was walkin back from battery park in the financial district, i was takin pics when all of a sudden i saw rescue workers running my way. the cops started running, and the nat'l guard told us [there were lots of curious onlookers] all to clear out of the area. everyone started running, and i found myself running with them down the street. during the sprint someone yelled "its gonna fall!" and later on i found out that they thought liberty one was gonna collapse. it turned out to be a false alarm, of course.
on sunday i went on my second excursion, and i went back up on greenwich st near the hudson river. i got some more pics of the wreck, and i headed towards the west side highway. walking down the west side highway, there were little signs of where the border was, so i kept on walking, and there werent that many people either. soon enough, everyone i saw had red tags with them, and right that moment as i realized i was someplace i shouldnt be, a cop called me over. he asked what i was doing there, and i said i didnt kno where the frozen zone started, and after a while he finally let me go..
on the way back i got a bit close again and took a snap of the wreck. a nat'l guard told me to leave and he ended up in the pic, its pretty funny..
that night, i came back to rutgers.
and i mailed jill a letter!!!! i hope she mails me back x)
so thats my 3 weeks
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| ohmygodileavetomorrow! |
[30 Aug 2001|05:26pm] |
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mood |
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 excited |
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music |
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keep it, comin up, keep it, comin up.. |
] |
ohmygodileavetomorrow!!!!!!
get your freak on~
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| if you crash again live journal ... |
[27 Aug 2001|05:41pm] |
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mood |
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 hungry |
] |
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music |
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U2 - Elevation |
] |
so livejournal has been crashing these few days, thats why i havent been updating. anyway jeff came back friday night. it wouldve been even more hilarious if he came back this week, when almost everyone would have definitely been off to college. but somehow only i see the humor in this.
anyway im still not done with my college shopping, and i have yet to get a fan, blowdryer, etc. im gonna go finish the shopping off tomorrow, im thinkin of getting the aqua sock.
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| susan called me a drunk fu master |
[22 Aug 2001|12:52am] |
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mood |
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 drunk |
] |
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music |
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Afroman - Because I Got High |
] |
i leave for rutgers next friday, on the 31st. i think im one of the last ones to leave for college. jennie left last week [shes the earliest i know], a bunch of people are leaving wednesday [in a few hours!], friday, sunday, monday, and next wednesday.
and then theres jeff [aka "ghetto"], who still hasnt returned from his VACATION. this guy left the day after graduation, and didnt even bother staying for the last last last day of school, where we picked up our report cards and faulty diplomas. supposedly hes comin back friday, and he leaves for RIT on the 2nd [one of the latest i kno].
i have yet to clean out my room, and i still dunno what to do with some stuff, like uh, letters from certain someones years past.
i just figured out my schedule for my first semester, and it looks pretty decent. friday i dont have classes, and tuesday and wednesday i get to sleep til noon, literally. nice.
i got a cue stick yesterday, it was a cuetec, w/ fiberglass covering and a maple core. its real smooth, and i really like the grip on this baby. i dont have to be scared about it warping, so that was another plus.
i spent monday and tuesday at jason's house. it was real cool, and i got a bunch of stuff from susan. she got me a mirror [which was long ago], and from bermuda she got a shot glass and a corkscrew for me. apparently word of mouth travels quite far..
oh yea i jacked jason's nice bottle of brandy too.
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| jennie's in wash u.! |
[19 Aug 2001|01:31am] |
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mood |
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 relaxed |
] |
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music |
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some techno thing on this internet radio server |
] |
i went shoppin around for more college stuff with stu today. first we went around J & R lookin for radios, alarm clocks, and those sorts of things. then we hit staples and i picked up some college supplies - notebook, pens, and envelopes for possible transferring..
later on we went to conway, near seaport. there, stu found out that i sleep in trousers. yea, i dont sleep in PJs or shorts or just boxers, i sleep in pants. the pants i have are real soft and stuff, and they dont have belt loops, nor do they have those designer creases next to the pockets. so they cant really classify as trousers, but anyway, he got a good laugh from that. i couldnt find anything soft enough to sleep in, so we jet.
then we went to foot locker cuz he wanted to get new sneakers, and i was lookin for the aqua sock. suddenly, there was a commotion.
a black guy was being held by two employees, one black, one hispanic. the two workers were trying to subdue him; apparently he had been caught shoplifting..
hispanic employee: "chill..jus chill aight"
shoplifter: "i aint take nothin! i aint take nothin!"
black employee: "whats in your bag? open up your bag!"
shoplifter [still struggling]: "i aint take nothin!"
[employee #1 opened his bag and pulled out merchandise..i actually couldnt see cuz the shoplifter blocked my view, and probably that of a few other customers]
shoplifter: "i aint take nothin else!!"
employee #2: "aight jus get outta here"
[the two employees proceeded to push out the still struggling shoplifter..in one hand he held a bag, and the other, a can of soda..]
shoplifter: "aight aight i got sometn to show you..i got sometn to show you!"
employee #2: "yea i got sometn to show you too.."
as the shoplifter was pushed out of the store, he threw the can of soda into the store, and ran.
me: "stu so what do u think of the sock, should i get it?"
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| erf |
[18 Aug 2001|02:40am] |
| [ |
mood |
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excited |
] |
| [ |
music |
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the sound of my a/c whirring |
] |
wow, havent updated in a few days.. well, ive been shooting a lot of pool lately, in preparation for rutgers heh. im also thinkin about gettin a cue stick; roger got one yesterday [or should i say thursday] and it was a fiberglass excalibur 18 oz.
i was jus browsing rutgers' website, and it turns out that every kid gets a microfridge! im so excited. its supposed to be this mini fridge/ microwave thing, and im really lookin forward to stackin up on the instant foods..i can be the master instant chef on campus. hell, i can charge a dollar for a cup o' noodle!
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bern's journal
